Friday, May 27, 2011

Poetic License Horoscope for May 27- June 2

Gemini (May 19-June 21): In Upstate New York, the lilacs are blooming, reminding T.S. Eliot and the rest of us that life is finite. The smell of lilacs means: If you need something, get it. If you miss someone, call. If you love someone, and I KNOW you do, celebrate!

Cancer (June 22-July 23): See you in the fall, says a favorite Cancer, cryptically, by email. I hope it does mean he’ll visit, but “See you in the fall” is also what you can say to most of your inhibitions, most of your practicality, to most of your loneliness. Summer is for busy and sun.

Leo (July 24-Aug. 23): You are an evening walk in rainy sun. Put down your rainbow umbrella and let the drops and beams smooch your wonderful face. You are hereby awarded the dragonfly of bravery, the humidity of love.

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): “It is extremely sluttish, wicked and slothful to fuck in the afternoons, and therefore totally enjoyable.” (Cynthia Heimel) Wake up for a few hours first. Eat strawberry waffles in bed, read a good novel about art, catch up on Wait Wait, Don’t Tell Me. Then, anything!

Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 21): “I have faith that potential experiences are infinite and our powers of description are finite. Go ahead and learn, because you’ll never run out of mysteries.”(Doug Muder) Whatever information you’re compiling, collect it like magic.

Scorpio (Oct. 22-Nov. 22): The stars don’t believe in The Secret or Positive Psychology or any other kind of thought-policing magical thinking, but it couldn’t hurt to make a list of everything you wish you had, and look at pictures of each.

Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 22): Get up from your work. Have a glass of water. Stroll around the neighborhood, looking at dogs and flowers. Do your nails. Sort your collection of paper letters. Work will be there when you get back, I promise.

Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20): We like to worry about love together, you and me, but pretty soon, you’ll have more than you can handle. The stars would like to take this opportunity to shine on your every wish, text, phone call, and online account.

Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19): “Just put on a cute outfit tomorrow night and go dance with people of indeterminate gender, and everything will be okay.” (Hannah McDonald) Now would be an excellent time to make a list of all the good advice you’ve given, email it to yourself, and believe it.

Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20): You are getting the job, the publication credit, the pretty house with a gingham kitchen, the Warhol print you always wanted, the rescue dachshund, the multifamily yardsale like a treasure trove, everything!

Aries (March 21-April 18): “Picture Sappho just before she coined bittersweet.” (Doug Muder) Whatever you can’t find words for, stay there for a while, like meditation, like love, like the sudden gift of silence.

Taurus (April 19-May 18): “I know/ I’ll never be lonely./I’ve got/ songs in my blood./I’m carrying all of the love of an orchestra.” (Noah and the Whale) Please be patient while we tune the strings, okay?

Poetic License Horoscopes is a free syndicated series which appears weekly on such lit blogs as The Serotonin Factory, Critical Mass and The Legendary and Apiary If you are interested in adding the Poetic License Horoscopes to your lit journal / lit blog, please email me at

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