List for the OK Cupid Support Group
with thanks to Olivia Conti
- It’s important to know your your from your you’re, of course, but also keep in mind that “less” is an amount and “fewer” is a number. Am I a bad person if this distracts me from the cute thing you said about the fireflies?
- What would a girl do these days if she didn’t like beardy guys? Seriously, if you look like you might be in Band of Horses, I’m in.
- I don’t like chatting. It gets out of control with all the potential misspelling. Send me a nice note.
He: “C sharp?”
Why is this not cute?
- I started a FetLife profile, but then I realized that no matter how emphatic, snuggling is not a fetish.
- Me: I can’t tell if this guy is a serial killer, or just kind of metal.
Amy: I think maybe you are less likely to be murdered than you think.
- Dear guys who changed his mind and decided he didn’t like me back after all,
I’m still mad at you for kissing that other guy who changed his mind and decided he didn’t like me back after all either. Also I am still mad that you switched to a cuter picture before I could press “hide.”
- My iPod has benefitted more from this experience than any other part of my body. I’ll hopefully add “so far.”
8.You had me at the party scene from Beyond the Valley of the Dolls.
You had me at “I just got the entire Mystery Science Theater 3000 series on DVD.”
You had me at the Elvis song that I opened at work-it made all the librarians swoon.
You had me at the industrial remix of Britney Spears’s Toxic.
You had me at the industrial remix of My Moon My Man by Feist.
You had me at sending Billy Joel’s Allentown because it reminded you of the Occupy movement.
- As much as we love to nitpick about grammar, there is nothing cuter than a typo
in a sentence that’s asking you out.