When I was a teenager protesting Operation Desert
Storm and wishing I had more people to protest with than my mom and two or
three friends (Thanks mom though!!!) I would never have guessed I would be
standing in the middle of a gorgeous and vibrant peace protest in 2020 just
feeling like a BITCH.
I love, love, LOVE being an activist in Philly. I love
that whenever I’m mad about something big I can type the keywords into Facebook
and find a protest already planned. But there’s a hazard here too: You almost
always have to stand around for a while listening to voter-suppressive nonsense
from young, mostly-white groups who seem to have a LOT of (Ahem, Russian?) funding
to print their stickers and signs.
The crowd at Saturday’s anti-war rally, hosted by
Philly’s Party for Socialism and Liberation, was as diverse as Philly protests
so often are: all ages and walks of life, some young folks with covered faces
walking the periphery to keep us safe, veterans, nice middle-aged ladies, etc. But
the speakers…
One of the first speakers I heard, a young African-American
man, asserted the Bernie-ism/Russian talking point that race doesn’t matter,
going on to say that “If you’re being choked by a policeman, is it going to
feel better if that policeman is black?” Never mind who is usually getting
choked, I guess, I did agree with him about Police Abolition, but I wasn’t surprised
when he blamed today’s international tensions on Hillary and Barrack (who
certainly do share responsibility) instead of our current nihilist-in-chief.
I didn’t feel entitled to interrupt or confront that
speaker, but the next few ladies were voter-discouraging white socialist ladies,
the worst bane (I mean, the worst bane on our side) of my protest existence.
“We cannot give our power over to the Democrats! It
doesn’t matter who is in power!”
Except that:
“We need a Green New Deal!”*
At this point, I couldn’t help but to screech out “But
you need the right people in power to do that!” I felt like an unpeaceful
monster, like I was letting down the teenage idealist I’d been, but Jesus fuck.
(Possibly AOC is one of the TWO people allowed to be
in government? But still, she can’t Green New Deal on her own!)
I’m sorry, young me, for wanting to kick the next
speaker so badly, but I can’t, can’t, can’t deal with the white girl from “Refuse
Fascism” who tells every crowd, at every protest, that voting doesn’t matter.
Advising a mostly-people-of-color crowd not to participate in elections is so
evil it makes my heart evaporate through my ears. I’ve seen Refuse Fascism (they
of the well-funded signage) preach nonvoting to crowds of immigrants and immigration
activists. I’ve seen them colonize a Black Lives Matter vigil for Stephon
Clark.
How can I explain to Young Hippie Me that I think a
group called “Refuse Fascism” is evil and funded by Russia? She would be mad
that I’d even distrust another country! But then, she never had The Muller Report
as driving-back-from-the-beach listening.
It’s settling in that with an all-white slate of
Democratic candidates, I may spend the year hearing the refrain that “identity
politics” are over, that economic inequality is the only inequality that matters.
I’ve already heard NPR singing that tune, and even my sassy feminist news
sources forget that we have an actively white supremacist president and an
implicitly white supremacist Democratic (oh wait, but not really) front-runner so
maybe identity DOES have an impact. (For way, way WAY better writing on the
topic: https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/10/the-first-white-president-ta-nehisi-coates/537909/))
I miss Hillary. I don’t want to think her platform was
our last chance for real progress. I know it isn’t. Of course I’ll keep canvassing,
marching, and shouting back when I need to. John Lewis told me to!
To idealist teenage me, I’ll say:
I’m sorry we’ve been protesting the same war for 30
years.
But look at all the people out here marching with us!
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