Inventing a Lover
after Meghan O’Rourke’s Inventing a Horse
Inventing a Lover is not easy
One must not only think of the person
One must think of interactions; dinner, movies, conversation
One must include a bed suitable for lovers to sleep in
or sleep in with a human like you
You must imagine his body heat next to yours;
smell breakfast cooking when half the bed is empty
accustom yourself to the confines of a duet
holding in mind even when you are tired
promises, reactions, vows and
consequences
One must imagine the grief from him being absent
One must build someone not frightened by your flaws
or the cracking of your toes each morning
who understands the times you are being timid
versus the times your patience has grown thin with silence
One must imagine the absence of money
carrying another person through such a thing, the living weight
of his feet on the cold bathroom floor
stray bits of shaved stubble since he is real therefore inconvenient
and sometimes tired after climax
sweat on his brow the thick smell of sex humid in the air
one must imagine love
in the mind that does not know love
an alien mind, a love that does not depend
on your image
or your understanding;
indifferent to all that you lack
Build a home
complete with a fogged up bathroom mirror
scents you have yet to soak into your skin
and a pile of crumpled sheets on the bed
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