Spring Fever Mix Tape: Poetic License Horoscopes

***This week's springtastic picture comes from my sister, Katie Carter, who is my favorite photographer!***

Poetic License Horoscope for February 18-24

Spring Fever Mix Tape


Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19): Write About Love (Belle and Sebastian): Whatever cubicle nightmare is glitter-hazing your head, your heart needs some fresh air. Go outside and get sunbeams on your face. Map the snowmelt rivers, or better yet, follow them.

Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20): (Portland, Oregon) You’re My Home (Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen): “We’re so thankful for everything we’ve got, and we’re so sorry for everything we’re not.” Except that you never have to apologize. Your heart is as bountiful as a Portland food truck. You are the opposite of an ironic mustache. Like the Rose City, your aim is true.

Aries (March 21-April 18): The Cave (Mumford and Sons): “The sun, it rises slowly as you walk/ Away from all the fears/ And all the faults you've left behind.” You are now leaving Plato’s cave. Things aren’t shadows anymore, they’re three-dimensional.


Taurus (April 19-May 18): Firework (Glee Cast Version): Everyone has come to the field and spread out their blankets as the blue fades from the sky and the stars appear. They’re waiting for you with a soundtrack of sighs. You are only for special occasions, only for glimmering across their upturned faces.

Gemini (May 19-June 21): The Suburbs (Arcade Fire): Things may seem end-of-the-worldy, but a lot of it plans to stick around, I promise. Ride bikes around like little kids. Take out your camera and record every angle of your living sight. Have faith in the horizon, and even in the cul-de-sac.

Cancer (June 22-July 23): Animal (Miike Snow): You shapeshifter, mixing your signals, fading in and out like a pulse. You can decide what you are on any highway. “Now you’re pulling your disguise up. Are you free or are you tied up?”

Leo (July 24-Aug. 23): Home (LCD Soundsystem) and Home (The Magnetic Zeroes): Get there and stay there, or carry it with you. Everything you hope for is stacked up around your ears. Remember your best friend is your breath, and most importantly: come back, come back, come back.

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): El Scorcho (Weezer): Somebody is always reading your diary, decoding the heart-doodles in the margins. Follow love with or without mistranslation, whether or not you are even legible. Send out sparks like homing beacons, it’s okay for now, the waiting.

Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 21): You Can Do It (Ice Cube): You are my very own living room dance party, and this is encouragement you can trust. “Don’t stop, git it git it.” You will.

Scorpio (Oct. 22-Nov. 22):  Touch the Sky (Kanye West): “Any pessimists I ain't talked to them,/Plus, I ain't have no phone in my apartment.” Feel free to be oblivious to anything that might hold you back. Pull out all of your household wires if necessary.

Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 22): Born this Way (Lady Gaga): It doesn’t matter if you were born this way or not—the you that you are creating out of the materials given (hardship, music, TV shows, imaginary limits) is so perfect that it is too beautiful to look at. Get yourself to a disco ball, and refract all over the place.

Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20): Awake my Soul (Mumford and Sons)  “How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes/ I struggle to find any truth in your lies/ And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know/ This weakness I feel I must finally show/ Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all/ But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall/ Lend me your eyes I can change what you see/ But your soul you must keep, totally free”

Poetic License Horoscopes is a free syndicated series which appears weekly on such lit blogs as The Serotonin Factory, Critical Mass  and The Legendary If you are interested in adding Poetic License Horoscopes to your lit journal / lit blog, please email me at serotoninfactory@gmail.com.

Motivation Mondays! Playlist

So I've decided to make the "How to Stay Motivated" series into a regular feature.

Being a slacker at heart, I am pretty new to the idea of being motivated, so if you have some ideas, feel free to comment or you can email them to me at serotoninfactory@gmail.com

Here are some things that motivate me and keep away the Winter blahs (Besides a full spectrum light bulb.)

1. Spite
2. My cute cute students.
3. Knowing that life is finite and stuff.
4. Carrie Brownstein
5. My complicated feelings about Kanye West.
6. Too Beautiful to Live

This mix celebrates all of those things.


Walk Fast


1. Stronger--Kanye West
2. Catch My Disease--Ben Lee
3. Ready to Start--Arcade Fire
4. Dream of the 90s--Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen
5. Portland, Oregon (You're My Home)--Carrie Brownstein and Fred Armisen
6. F**k You--Cee-lo Green
7. I Can Change--LCD Soundsystem
8. Crooked Teeth--Death Cab for Cutie
9. Hurt Feelings--Flight of the Conchords
10. Hands in the Air--Girl Talk
11. Good Day--Nappy Roots
12. You Can Do It--Ice Cube
13. Tight Rope--Janelle Monae feat. Big Boi
14. Poker Face--Lady Gaga
15. Animal--Miike Snow
16. Dance Yrself Clean--LCD Soundsystem
17. Whip My Hair--Willow Smith
18. Touch the Sky--Kanye West


"Dance Yrself Clean" from Hung Low Films on Vimeo.

Poetic License Horoscope for January 7-13

Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20): Inventory your coffee cups. Count house cleanings like a year-long Advent calendar. Evaluate the necessity of every scarf, hat, and necklace. Visit your local thrift stores like a January Santa.

Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19): Declare all 2010 complaints complete. Unsubscribe to your grudges, put salve on your scars. Be ready for more loves and more exquisite disappointments.

Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20): One word of advice for you this week: Pillows.

Aries (March 21-April 18): In the words of Hafiz:
Now
That
All your worry
Has proved such an
Unlucrative
Business,
Why
Not
Find a better
Job.

Taurus (April 19-May 18): The Maven of Emotional Awesome, Jen “Flash” Andrews of Too Beautiful to Live has the most lovable New Year’s Resolution: Give yourself and others a break. Don’t lay awake worrying about spilt words or misspent kitchen table diatribes.

Gemini (May 19-June 21): I spent New Year’s Eve at my Aunt Patti’s house getting pretty drunk with my brother and my cousins and my cousins’ friends. I played my first game of Flip Cup (with chardonnay!) at 36. I wasn’t good at it. Do something rewardingly foolish—let yourself off the leash a little.

Cancer (June 22-July 23): Take a break. Everything doesn’t have to be written today, even if it seems that way. To paraphrase LCD Soundsystem’s spoken word/workout tune Pow Pow Pow: (No need to keep) “Coming back, coming back, coming back
Until there's nothing left in the well. Is that what they call it, the well?”

Leo (July 24-Aug. 23): My lovely Leo wife has decided to split the year into 52 mini-projects, and I can’t wait to see what she comes up with. What can you make in a week? Is it beautiful?

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): I spent a pretty big chunk of my Christmas vacation watching episodes of Ally McBeal. It’s so romantic; it’s like the How I Met Your Mother of its time. Walk home from work in soft focus, with dreamy/feminist Nineties music for your guide.

Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 21): Irony is so last year. See how much sincerity you can get away with.
Scorpio (Oct. 22-Nov. 22): Bring last year’s photos into the physical realm. Frame something optimistic. Spread all the pictures out like Tarot cards and read the future—you’ll like what you see.

Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 22): Leave all of your self help books on someone else’s doorstep, like so many paperback orphans. It turns out you’re perfect.

Song of the Year: Home

This song makes me so much more optimistic than maybe it's meant to. It wasn't exactly "A terrible year," but I love the combination of leaving things be and hanging onto what matters. Like so many LCD Soundsystem Songs, its about the kind of adulthood I aspire to.

Does it get any more romantic than: "Look around you, you're surrounded, it won't get any better"?

There's an official video that's good, look it up, but I like it better with my own images of "home" in my head...

Poetic License Horoscope for September 24-Oct 1

A Mini Tarot Reading

(Note: If you enjoy made-up advice and pop-culture mysticism, come visit me at the Mount Airy Village Fair this Sunday, September 26th! You can get a totally made up Tarot reading, make September Valentines, and peruse my brand new book of love poems, Adventures of A Lazy Polyamorist. XOXOXOX-Jane)

Virgo (Aug. 24-Sept. 23): Four of Cups-: Gloria Steinem said “Women have a terminal case of gratitude.” I recently switched my Gratitude Journal to a Happiness List. I felt like being so grateful made me disappear and get taken for granted. Dial back the thank you notes, but still notice what you’re given.

Libra (Sept. 24-Oct. 21): Force- A fancy lady is grasping the lion’s jaw. The lion looks kind of abashed. You are wearing infinity as hat—grasp the application process, your bank balance, your forgotten novel, any untamable thing.

Scorpio (Oct. 22-Nov. 22): The Sun- Your egg has hatched, your community garden is exploding with tomatoes, and your tweets are retweeted to rival Rob Cordry’s. Like Lady Gaga bringing her asked-and-told soldiers onto the red carpet and into the news cycle, use your weird voice for good.

Sagittarius (Nov. 23-Dec. 22): Ten of Wands- If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it might be a good time to remember that gold is heavy. Delegate some of your riches; pass it on like coins along the road.

Capricorn (Dec. 23-Jan. 20): The Lovers- Your interloper might not be an arrow-wielding centaur, but nonetheless you need some element of hybridizing, some alchemy, even if it only means switching to half-decaf, making art in mixed media, or being a little two-faced.

Aquarius (Jan. 21-Feb. 19): Five of Cups- Something you put a lot of stock in is starting to lose some of its meaning—that very well COULD be you in the spotlight, losing your religion. Be lost. Be a little at sea and see what floats by next.

Pisces (Feb. 20-March 20): Wheel of Fortune- I married a woman who is excellent at making paper boats. I would advise you to do the same. It doesn’t matter if you lose your crown or ascend to the seagulls; these temporary vessels keep you strangely grounded.

Aries (March 21-April 18): The Moon- Once, when I was 20 or so, I stayed up all night painting The Moon card for Joe Prisco, a boyfriend of questionable value. He dumped me that very weekend, but a least I had the painting.

Taurus (April 19-May 18): Five of Coins- In the words of LCD Soundsystem, “Drunk girls know that love is an astronaut. It comes back but it’s never the same.” Try again anyway.
Gemini (May 19-June 21): Nine of Wands- Choose nine things you can’t do anything about this week. Don’t do anything about them.

Cancer (June 22-July 23): Queen of Cups- According to heartthrob folk singer Peter Mulvey, “The trouble with shoes is they come untied. You might take a fall down the stairs. Then a poet might come along and say “Isn’t that just like life?” The trouble with poets is they see poetry everywhere.” Be like that.

Leo (July 24-Aug. 23): The Magician- Intuition isn’t just blindly letting your feelings make your decisions. It’s using the information already stored in your brain. Blink like Malcolm Gladwell, Leo, and trust your decisions.

Song of the Week: Home

Last night, in the middle of an argument with my poor overworked wife, I got in the car to go to the Acme. This song came on and, after thanking my lucky stars that I live someplace where this song could come on the radio, I realized it was so perfect for how lost I was feeling/ how dumb I was being.

Hopefully I can make it up to her with lots of snuggling during Project Runway time.

Home-- LCD Soundsystem
Home
Home
Home
Home
Home
Home
Take me home

Just do it right
Make it perfect and real
Because it's everything
No everything was never the deal

So grab your things and stumble into the night
So we can shut the door
Oh, shut the door on terrible times

Yeah, do it right
And head again into space
So you can carry on
And carry on, and fall all over the place

This is the trick, forget a terrible year
That we can break the laws
Until it gets weird

And this is what you waited for
But under lights, we're all unsure
So tell me
What would make you feel better?

As night has such a local ring
And love and rock are pick-up things
And you know it
Yeah, you know it
Yeah, you know

Take

Forget your past
This is your last chance now
And we can break the rules
Like nothing will last

You might forget
Forget the sound of a voice
Still you should not forget
Yeah, don't forget
The things that we laughed about

And after rolling on the floor
And thankfully, a few make sure that you get home
And you stay home
And you better

'Cause you're afraid of what you need
Yeah, you're afraid of what you need
If you weren't, yeah you weren't
Then I don't know what we'd talk about

Yeah no one ever knows what you're talking about
So i guess you're already there
No one opens up when you scream and shout
But it's time to make a couple things clear

If you're afraid of what you need
If you're afraid of what you need
Look around you, you're surrounded
It won't get any better

Until the night